Friday, July 2, 2010


yep today was the last day of the term
a two week holiday
well i talked to him more today
his locker is fine now
and its near mine
so i see him a lot now
but i only spoke to him at recess
but more on that later
this morning A.P the girl was talking to me
she was telling me how they talked about it in tutor yesterday
how he was saying that he isnt going out with her
that he doesnt have a girlfriend
that he doesnt even know her name
but apparently she thinks they've been together for like a year
as i have heard
well anyways
at recess he was passing by
and like E.M told me to talk to him
but i was like nah dw and shit
as long as we're not fighting
but then she tells him to sit next to her
so he sits
and i hug him
and tell him
"nawwww its your last day"
he was like yeah
and then i asked when he gets back and he said maybe friday
he started telling me it was cold
and so he stood up
and then i started to ask how was he
he said good
and then he asked me
i said good lol
then he went somewhere else
there was other stuff mentioned that is kinda pointless
like if the canteen was full and stuff
i didnt speak to him again until the beginning of lunch
which in some way does not count
E.M yelled his name out
and then i did too LOL
cause his locker is near mine
so like i see him there at lunch and recess and yeah
after school was the last time i saw him
i was exiting the school
sad that i didnt get to say bye
but there he was at the front
so we hugged
and i told him to have a safe trip
and he said he will
then i walked off to catch my bus
as i sat in the bus
and looked out the window and as he passed
my eyes met his
and he smiled at me
that irresistible smile
and i couldnt help but smile back
the pain was gone for that minute
i was happy
cause my bestfriend was happy
i know shit is going on with this other girl
cause she thinks they're together but they're not
but i know it will work out
today i also saw his fb status change from in a relationship to single
i didnt even know he was in a relationship
but everyone says he wasnt
i would of thought he'd tell me
but then again you can always believe facebook

lately me and him have been quite hesitant
especially cause of that girl
i think he might have figured out that i know about his situation with her
i think he thinks i'm sad or something
i'm hurt
but fine
i just miss being his bestfriend
us being close
its like we're distant
yet we still try at least to be close
well like i love him heaps
i always will like i will always love my ex
but since all this shit happened
the feelings are slowly going away
cause i cant stand the pain anymore
but his hug
his smile
his voice
makes me smile hard out
makes me forget all the pain
makes me love him more again
i cant let go of him cause i love him
very very much
i just want to be close again
i want my bestfriend back
my very close bestfriend
he's always gonna be my bestfriend
and i'll always be his (hopefully)
i love him
and i hope he has a safe trip on monday :)
and i cant wait to see him when we start school again in 2 weeks
or if i'm lucky when he gets back
love him with my heart and soul
and totally miss him already