Thursday, June 30, 2011

16th June 2011

i was in the process of making videos for my vlog
but then my camera kinda started stuffing up
which really bummed me out...
anyways i write this post
cause i've been having some thoughts
and here they are....
they are both good and bad for us i guess
the good thing is that we gain an imagination
its a chance to enter a world which is not normally reality
but the bad thing is that
our real lives seem dull in comparison
the main thing im talking about is FAIRYTALE
as in girls finding that guy and guys finding that girl
in reality it isnt always happy ending
and some tv shows show that
but at the end of the day
everyone ends up happy
which bumms me out
as most of you already know
i'm not with anyone right now
and i feel like i should get out there
and go looking for that guy
but then sometimes people say
if i stop looking, he will turn up
but idk
i'm at that point where i dont think i'll ever stop looking
cause im starting to feel like im ready for that kind of commitment now
i'm ready to be able to put my whole life in someone's hands
and for me to hold theirs
i've planned my whole life
my whole future
but the only thing/person missing is ..
that guy to help me along the way...
where is he... ??
with all that i've been through
and all that im going through now
it feels like the only person i can truly rely on
is myself...
and in a way thats really sad
but sometimes in life...
you have to go on... on your own.
i'm not asking any of you guys to date me...
or to feel sorry for me...
or even to give me advice or set me up with someone
i just wanted to be able to express myself to someone
who is interested
besides myself
cause honestly sometimes it feels like people pretend to be interested
but in the end they're just saying "yeah" or "ah huh"
but i know that at least my readers care a bit
well i'll write another post tomorrow or soon
hopefully im a step closer to finding my "other half"

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